80+ Zoolander Quotes that speaks a lot about Brainwashing

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Zoolanderbest Quotes

Zoolander Quotes that speaks a lot about brainwashing. There are so many Zoolander quotes that can help you when you are tired of being in the same old rut, and all you need is a little push, a little inspiration, a smile on the face, change of mood, bring you out of the banality of life, make you laugh a little, or may even make you cry a bit, and these Zoolander quotes exists just do that.

Directed by Ben Stiller in 2001, Zoolander is an American comedy-action film in which Stiller along with Owen Wilson and Will Ferrell are starring. The film contains specific parts of two short films written by Drake Sather and both directed by Stiller for televisions specials for VH1 Fashion Awards in 1996 to 1997.

Ben Stiller portrays a narcissist male model Derek Zoolander, who is dimwitted in both the short films and also in the movie. The movie involves corrupt fashion executives who are plotting the assassination of the Malaysian Prime Minister. Zoolander becomes the pawn for these corrupt people in fashion.  Bates penned the name “Derek Zoolander” while editing the first short film. He was inspired by names of Mark Vanderloo from Dutch and Johnny Zander an American, and both were male models who worked for Calvin Klein.

A self-absorbed dim-witted but a good guy Derek Zoolander is a failure model who is outcasted from the fashion industry by a rival model Hansel. Derek leaves New York to his hometown as his roommates die in a bizarre gasoline accident, where he is unfit for mining as his father and his brothers are miners. After returning to New York, Zoolander is hired by the fashion industry via Jacobim Mugatu and Derek’s agent Maury Ballstein to be brainwashed and to assassinate the Malaysian Prime Minister.

Journalist Matilda whose article also was responsible for Derek’s career feels guilty and tries to help Derek with all the fuss going in the Fashion Industry. After a tip from a mysterious guy, which says that the models are brainwashed and are killed after their jobs. Matilda, along with Derek and Hansel, tries to undo the assassination attempt and save the Prime Minister. The movie ends with a funny climax with an exciting twist. In the end, Derek and Matilda have a son Zoolander Junior.

Apart from the mixed reviews received for the weak humour of the fashion industry, the film was a success in the box office. In 2016, even after the negative reviews a second film, Zoolander 2 was released. Netflix UK in August 2016 released an animated series, Zoolander: Super Model.

We have dug up these Zoolander quotes from the depths of the internet and brought together best of these sayings in a single article. This post is probably the biggest database of Zoolander Sayings in a single place. These famous Zoolander quotes have the power to change your life by giving a novel outlook about the way you observe different aspects of your life. Hence, these popular Zoolander quotes should be read with caution and proper understanding of the context. Here are tons of Zoolander quotes that will open a treasure chest of Wisdom and experiences: –

“Dammit Derek, I’m a coal miner, not a professional film or television actor.”

Zoolander famous Quotes

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“I do not like snoopy reporter with lack of fashion sense, not one little bit.”

Zoolander popular Quotes (3)

“I can Dere-lick my own balls, thank you very much.”

 

Zoolander Quotes (5)

“I felt like, “This guy’s really hurting me.” And it hurt.”

Zoolander saying

“A week? What, are you having a whack attack? I saw you this afternoon, dum-dum.”

Zoolanderbest Quotes

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“Derek, I don’t know if you’re familiar with the belief that some aboriginal tribes hold. It’s the concept that a photo might steal a part of your soul. I mean, what are your
thoughts on that as someone who gets his picture taken for a living?”

“Derek, that’s nothing to be ashamed of. I’m sure there are a lot of people out there who can’t turn…I mean, there have got to be some people out there just like you
who can’t…turn…turn…left.”

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“Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you and your ‘do whatever it takes, ruin as many people’s lives, so long as you can make a name for yourself
as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied along the way, just so long so you can make a name for
yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied and dying along the way’?”

“Does being fat mean you’re a terrible person? I’m really asking you, Hansel.”

“Don’t ask questions. Just give in to the power of the tea.”

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“Hi Derek! My name’s Little Cletus and I’m here to tell you a few things about child labor laws, ok? They’re silly and outdated. Why back in the 30s, children as young as
five could work as they pleased; from textile factories to iron smelts. Yippee! Hurray!”

“How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can’t even fit inside the building?”

“I can Dere-lick my own balls, thank you very much.”

“I couldn’t understand why I didn’t look like them. I just didn’t get it so I became, so, um, I became…Bulimic.”

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“I do not like snoopy reporter with lack of fashion sense, not one little bit.”

“I feel like I’m taking crazy pills! I invented the piano key necktie, I invented it!”

“I felt like, “This guy’s really hurting me.” And it hurt.”

“I guess I would have to answer your question with another question. How many abodiginals do you see modeling?”

“I guess you can dere-lick my balls cap-E-tan.”

“I knew it was a joke Meekus, I just didn’t get it right away!”

“I suggest you and your Kmart Jaclyn Smith Collection outfit… stay the hell away from Derek Zoolander!”

“I think I’ve got the black lung, pop.”

“I think they’re vain, stupid, and incredibly self-centered.”

“I totally agree with you. But how do you feel about male models?”

“I wanted to create a new life for myself. I’m sorry I was born with this perfect bone structure, that my hair looks better done up with gel and mousse than hidden under
a stupid hat with a light on it. All I ever wanted to do was make you proud of me, pop.”

“I wasn’t like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut, I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere’s a
real hero of mine. Sting. Sting would be another person who’s a hero. The music he’s created over the years, I don’t really listen to it, but the fact that he’s making it, I
respect that. I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what product I’m selling? No. Do I know what I’m doing today? No. But I’m here, and I’m gonna give it my best
shot.”

“I’m a hand model, mama. A finger jockey. We think differently than the face and body boys… we’re a different breed.”

“I’m going to retire, withdraw from public life, and become a hermit crab.”

“I’m not an ambi-turner. It’s a problem I had since I was a baby. I can’t turn left.”

“I’m pretty sure there’s a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking. And I plan on finding out what that is.”

“I’m sorry that good-looking people like us made you throw up and feel bad about yourself.”

“I’ve got a prostate the size of a honeydew and a head full of bad memories.”

“If nobody has any objections, I believe I might be of service.”

“If there is anything that this horrible tragedy can teach us, it’s that a male model’s life is a precious, precious commodity. Just because we have chiseled abs and
stunning features, it doesn’t mean that we too can’t not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.”

“It’s a walk-off, it’s a walk-off.”

“It’s that damn Hansel! He’s so hot right now!”

“Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features doesn’t mean that we still can’t not die in a freak gasolinefight accident.”

“Let me show you Derelicte. It is a fashion, a way of life inspired by the very homeless, the vagrants, the crack whores that make this wonderful.”

“Let’s get back to the reason that we’re really here. Without much further ado, I give you the Derek Zoolander Center For Kids Who Can’t Read Good.”

“Listen, it’s not like we think that we’re actually in a control tower trying to reach outer space aliens or something. Okay?”

“Male models don’t think for themselves.”

“Merman! MERMAN!”

“Mugatu is so hot right now he could take a crap, wrap it in tinfoil, put a couple fish hooks on it and sell it to Queen Elizabeth as earrings.”

“Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an after-funeral party to attend.”

“Obey my dog!”

“Oh, I thought you were going to tell me what a bad eugoogalizor I am.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, did my pin get in the way of your *ss? Do me a favor and lose five pounds immediately or get out of my building like now!”

“One look?… ONE LOOK?! I don’t think so! (Derek reveals Magnum)”

“One of my heroes I guess would be Sting. I mean, I don’t listen to any of his music, but I really respect that he’s making it.”

“People come up to me all the time and say ‘you should be a model,’ or ‘you look just like a model,’ or ‘maybe you should try to be a man who models.’ And I always have
to laugh because I’m so good looking. Of course, I’m a model.”

“Rufus, Brint, and Meekus were like brothers to me. And when I say brother, I don’t mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it. Which is
more meaningful I think.”

“So I’m rappelling down Mount Vesuvius when suddenly I slip, and I start to fall. Just falling, ahhh ahhh, I’ll never forget the terror. When suddenly I realize “Holy sh*t,
Hansel, haven’t you been smoking Peyote for six straight days, and couldn’t some of this maybe be in your head?””

“There was a moment last night, when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, “Wow, I could really spend the
rest of my life with this woman”.”

“This has been an emotional day for all of us. I think we should get naked.”

“Uhh Earth to Matilda, I was at a day spa. Day, D-A-I-Y-E. Okay?”

“Well I guess it all started the first time I went through the second grade. I caught my reflection in a spoon while I was eating my cereal, and I remember thinking “wow,
you’re ridiculously good looking, maybe you could do that for a career.”

“What is this? A center for ants?!”

“What say we settle this on the runway… Han-Solo?”

“Who are you tryin’ to get crazy with, ese? Don’t you know I’m loco?”

“Who cares about Derek Zoolander anyway? The man has only one look, for Christ’s sake! Blue Steel? Ferrari? Le Tigra? They’re the same face! Doesn’t anybody notice
this? I feel like I’m taking crazy pills! I invented the piano key necktie, I invented it! What have you done, Derek? NOTHING! YOU’VE DONE NOTHING! NOTHIIIING! And I
will be a monkey’s uncle if I let you ruin this for me, because if you can’t get the job done, then I will!”

“With what?!? Your male modeling?!? Prancing around in your underwear with your wiener hanging out for everyone to see?!? You’re dead to me boy. You’re more dead
to me than your dead mother. I just thank the lord she didn’t live to see her son as a mermaid.”

“You can read minds?”

“You know what, can we just cut it out with all the Earth-tos, please?”

“You know, I love modelling. I’d like to do this forever. When I’m 30, I hope I’m still modeling.”

“You think that you’re too cool for school, but I have a newsflash for you Walter Cronkite….you aren’t.”

“You want an opinion? With a push-up bra you could have a nice rack of lamb going on up there.”

“You’re excused, and I’m not your bra!”

“Are you challenging me to a walk-off… Boo-Lander?”

“Be professionally good looking.”

“Brint”

“By the way, you were wrong about my outfit. It’s the Cheryl Ladd collection and I got it at JC Penney’s. On sale!”

“How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can’t even fit inside the building?”
“Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features, it doesn’t mean that we too can’t not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.”
“Sting would be another person who’s a hero. The music he’s created over the years, I don’t really listen to it, but the fact that he’s making it, I respect that.”
“But why male models?”

“I feel like I’m taking crazy pills!”
“You can read minds?”
“They’re *in* the computer?”
“Listen to your friend Billy Zane. He’s a cool dude.”

“A eugoogoolizer…one who speaks at funerals…Or did you think I was too stupid to know what a eugoogooly was?”

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