90+ Funny Christmas Jokes That Are So Amazing

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Want to know more about another genre of jokes? Well here it is!  Funny Christmas Jokes also called Realty Humor have the potential to make us laugh or think in various dimensions! Not alone that, they also offer great comic relief at times of need!

If your quest is centered upon jokes that can make you realize facts and truth with a twist, Military Jokes is what you should need! Presenting 90+ Funny Christmas Jokes that are so amazing to read for great comical relief and joy!

Why was Santa’s little helper depressed?

Because he had very low elf esteem

 

What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?

A rebel without a Claus.

 

Why did Frosty ask for a divorce?

His wife was a total flake.

 

Why does Scrooge love reindeer so much?

Because every single buck is dear to him!

 

What’s Santa’s favorite snack food?

Crisp Pringles.

 

Why do mummies like Christmas so much?

They’re into all the wrapping.

 

Nurse them back to elf.

 

What nationality is Santa Claus?

North Polish.

 

What do you call a blind reindeer?

I have no eye deer.

 

What do you call an obnoxious reindeer?

Rude-olph.

 

How is Christmas exactly like your job?

You do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit.

 

What’s every elf’s favorite type of music?

Wrap.

 

What do you call a scary looking reindeer?

A cariboo.

 

What’s the absolute best Christmas present?

A broken drum—you can’t beat it!

 

What’s the most perfectly awesome Christmas present?

A messed up drum—you can’t beat it!

 

What do reindeers say before they make you a wisecrack?

This present one’s going to sleigh you!

 

What do you call Santa’s little partners?

Subordinate provisos.

 

What did Adam say to his significant other on Christmas?

It’s at last Christmas, Eve!

 

What’s the contrast between the Christmas letters in order and the common letter set?

The Christmas letter set has No-el.

Hope these 90+ Funny Christmas made you laugh? Spread the joy and share the vibe!

What do you call a broke Santa Claus?
Saint-nickel-less.

best funny christmas jokes

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Why do mummies like Christmas so much?
They’re into all the wrapping.

famous funny christmas jokes

What do you get when you cross a duck with Santa?
A Christmas quacker.-

funny christmas jokes (2)

What’s Santa’s favorite snack food?
Crisp Pringles.

funny christmas jokes

How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?
Nothing. It was on the house!

popular funny christmas jokes

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How did the ornament get addicted to Christmas?
He was hooked on trees his whole life.

Why was Santa’s little helper depressed?
Because he had very low elf esteem.

What does the Grinch do with a baseball bat?
Hits a gnome and runs.

What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?
A rebel without a Claus.

Why did Frosty ask for a divorce?
His wife was a total flake.

Why does Scrooge love reindeer so much?
Because every single buck is dear to him!

How do you help someone who’s lost their Christmas spirit?
Nurse them back to elf.

What do you call an elf wearing ear muffs?
Anything you want. He can’t hear you!

What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.

What do you call a blind reindeer?
I have no eye deer.

What do you call an obnoxious reindeer?
Rude-olph.

How is Christmas exactly like your job?
You do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit.

What’s every elf’s favorite type of music?
Wrap.

What do you call a scary looking reindeer?
A cariboo.

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite.

What’s the absolute best Christmas present?
A broken drum—you can’t beat it!

What do reindeers say before they tell you a joke?
This one’s gonna sleigh you!

What do you call Santa’s little helpers?
Subordinate clauses.

What did Adam say to his wife on Christmas?
It’s finally Christmas, Eve!

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What’s the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has No-el.

How do you know when Santa’s around?
You can always sense his presents.

What do you call an elf that can sing and dance?
Elfis.

Where does santa keep all his money?
At the local snow bank.

Why did the Grinch go to the liquor store?
He was searching for some holiday spirit.

Why don’t crabs celebrate Christmas?
Because they’re shell-fish.

What’s every parent’s favorite Christmas Carol?
Silent Night.

What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Frosted Flakes or Ice Crispies.

What do you call Santa when he takes a break?
Santa Pause.

Why is Santa kind of scared of chimneys?
Because he’s so claus-trophobic.

What do elves learn in school?
The elfa-bet.

Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas party?
He had no body to go with.

What do you call a cat on the beach on Christmas Day?
Sandyclaws.

Why do Christmas trees like the past so much?
Because the present’s beneath them.

Why is Santa so good at karate?
Cause he’s got a black belt.

What part of the body do you only see around Christmas?
The mistletoe.

Where does mistletoe go to get famous?
Holly-wood!

Why is Santa always cast as the lead in the local musical?
Because he has such good presents.

What do you get when you deep fry Santa?
Crisp Cringle.

Why does Santa always enter through the chimney?
Because it soots him.

How do sheep say Merry Christmas in Mexico?
Fleece Navidad.

What’s Santa’s favorite candy?
Jolly ranchers.

What do you get when you mix a Christmas tree and an iPad?
A pineapple!

What do you call a snowman that can walk?
Snow-mobile.

What do hip-hop artists do on Christmas?
Unwrap.

What do you call a frog hanging from the ceiling?
Mistletoad.

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Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?

I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. She told me “Nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace” So I bought her nothing.

How did Mary and Joseph know that Jesus weighed 4.2 kg? Cause thay had a weigh in the mangor.

One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, “Please send me a sister.” Santa Clause wrote him back, “Ok, send me your mother.”

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic

Remember, children. The best way to get a puppy for Christmas is to beg for a baby brother.

There’s nothing like the joy on a kid’s face when he first sees the PlayStation box containing the socks I got him for Christmas.

How do you know when Santa’s in the room? You can sense his presents.

Shouldn’t you be on top of the tree, Angel?

What is the best Christmas present ever? A broken drum – you can’t beat it!

Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backward.

The 3 stages of man: He believes in Santa Claus. He doesn’t believe in Santa Claus. He is Santa Claus.

What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen? Snowballs.

Why doesn’t Santa have any kids? He only comes once a year.

What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish

I bought my son a fridge for Christmas. – I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.

If i was the Grinch, I wouldn’t steal Christmas. I’d steal you.

If your left leg was thanksgiving, and your right leg is Christmas, can I come visit you between the holidays?

What kind of motorbike does Santa ride? A Holly Davidson!

Santa’s elves are just a bunch of subordinate Clauses.

If you jingle my bells ill promise you a white Christmas.

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

Whats the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has Noel.

Two snowmen in a field, one turned to the other and said “I don’t know about you but I can smell carrots!”

Who is never hungry at Christmas? The turkey – he’s always stuffed!

When you stop believing in Santa Claus is when you start getting clothes for Christmas!

What is the best evidence that Microsoft has a monopoly? Santa Claus had to switch from Chimneys to Windows.

According to my kids’ Christmas lists, they think this parenting gig pays pretty well.

What goes “oh oh oh”? Santa walking backwards.

Which of Santa’s reindeers needs to mind his manners the most? “Rude”olph

Let’s both be naughty this year and save Santa the trip.

Why did Michael’s grades drop after the holidays? Because everything was marked down!

Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? He sold his soul to Santa.

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My wife set a limit on how much we can spend on each other for Christmas. It’s $100 on me and $500 on her.

Did you know that Santa’s not allowed to go down chimneys this year? It was declared unsafe by the Elf and Safety Commission.

What will fall on the lawn first? An autumn leaf or a Christmas catalog?

How do you know that Santa is a man? No woman wears the same attire every year.

You are the reason Santa even has a naughty list.

There are 364 days until Christmas and people already have their Christmas lights up. Unbelievable…

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