70+ Funny Adult Jokes That Will Make You Think A Lot

funny adult jokes (2)

Jokes are of various types and kinds! At one end we have Bad Jokes, Children Jokes, Adult Jokes are much more! Well, how about Funny Adult Jokes? Have you ever heard or come across such types of Funny Adult Jokes that have actually made you think in a lot of perspectives?

Keeping the above situation in mind and thought, we have compiled 70+ Funny Adult Jokes that will make you think a lot from a lot of perspectives and angles! Not alone that you will also get to explore the other side of humor and reality in a better manner!

Here we go!

Searching for a no-nonsense joke to get you a simple snicker? At that point these interesting grown-up jokes are for you. We’ve incorporated the most amusing jokes about sex that you’ll at any point run over, so you can proceed to tell your companions – ideally without culpable them. Decision on your preferred amusing grown-up joke!

  1. What do boobs and toys share for all intents and purpose?

They were both initially made for children, yet daddies wind up playing with them.

2…What’s the distinction among oral and butt-centric sex?

Oral sex fills your heart with joy. Butt-centric sex makes your opening frail.

  1. How is a push-up bra like a pack of chips?

When you open it, you understand it’s half-unfilled.

  1. What did the storm say to the coconut tree?

Clutch your nuts, this ain’t no standard penis massage.

  1. Why does Santa Claus have such a major sack?

He just comes once per year.

6.What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube share for all intents and purpose?

The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

So, the next time you come across any situation, just read these 70+ Funny Adult Jokes That Will Make You Think A Lot and bring in the change.

Sex without condoms is magical… A baby appears and father disappears.

best funny adult jokes

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile

famous funny adult jokes

Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering a minor.

funny adult jokes (2)

I’m not sure how I feel about masturbation… On the one hand, it’s pretty great.

funny adult jokes

A man goes to the doctor and says “I’ve got a problem, I have 5 penises.”
The doctor says “Wow, how do your pants fit?”
He replies, “Like a glove.”

popular funny adult jokes

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She gave me an Australian kiss. It’s the same as a French kiss, but down under.
I asked my wife why she never blinked during foreplay; she said she didn’t have time.
What do you call an expert fisherman? A Master Baiter
How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant? He forgot to wrap his Whopper.

What did the one lesbian vampire say to the other? … See you next month

What is a Jewish person’s first discount? 10% off the penis.

Three words to ruin a man’s ego…? “Is it in?”

What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist.

I’m not sure how I feel about masturbation… On the one hand, it’s pretty great.

Why aren’t koalas actual bears? The don’t meet the koalafications.

What’s long, hard and erects stuff? A crane!

Losing my virginity was a lot like how I learned to ride a bike. My Dad had a firm grip on my shoulders.

How did you quit smoking? I decided to start smoking only after sex.

I hope Death is a woman. That way it will never come for me.

What’s the difference between attraction, love and showing off? Spit, swallow, gargle.

Did you hear about the depressed plumber? He’s been going through some shit.

If you don’t believe in oral sex, keep your mouth shut.

What’s 72? 69 with three people watching.

Why do vegans give better head? They’re used to eating nuts.

How is sex like a game of bridge? If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner

What do you call a herd of cows masturbating? Beef strokin’ off.

What do you call a virgin lying on a waterbed? A cherry float.

What’s a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

What’s the difference between a girlfriend and wife? 45 lbs.

What’s another name for a vagina? The box a penis comes in.

Boy: “Want to hear a joke about my dick? Never mind, it’s too long.”
Girl: “Wanna hear a joke about my pussy? Never mind, you won’t get it.”

Two goldfish are in a tank. One looks at the other and says, “You know how to drive this thing?!”

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What do you call a teenage girl who doesn’t mastrubate? A liar.

Kid 1: “Hey, I bet you’re still a virgin.”
Kid 2: “Yeah, I was a virgin until last night .”
Kid 1: “As if.”
Kid 2: “Yeah, just ask your sister.”
Kid 1: “I don’t have a sister.”
Kid 2: “You will in about nine months.”

When I die, I hope I have enough time to point at a complete stranger and whisper “You did this.”

The difference between “Ooooooh” and “Aaaaaah” is about three inches.

What do you call a deaf gynecologist? A lip reader.

Wife comes back from the doctor and says to her husband:
– Honey, I have a sad news – a gynecologist told me not have sex for three weeks…
– And what the dentist said?

The speed limit of sex is 68, because at 69 you have to turn around.

How is life like a penis? Your girlfriend makes it hard.

What did the O say to the Q? Dude, your dick’s hanging out.

What do you call a guy with a small dick? Just-in.

How did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the pizza before it was cool.

How do you eat a squirrel? You spread its little legs.

Making love to a woman is like playing the violin. I don’t know how to do it.

Why are women like KFC? After you’ve finished with the thigh and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.

I went out dressed like a chicken last night and I met a girl who was dressed like an egg. One thing led to another and the lifelong question was answered:
it was the chicken.

Why do women have orgasms? Just another reason to moan, really.

Owls always look like they just saw a penis for the first time.

My gay friend got fired from the sperm bank because they caught him drinking on the job.

What’s a adult actress’ favorite drink? 7 Up in cider.

What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD? A trip without kids.

What’s the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A hooker can wash herr crack and resell it.

I love every bone in your body, especially mine.

What do you call ball’s on your chin? A dick in your mouth!

What did the banana say to the vibrator? Why are YOU shaking? She’s going to eat me!

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What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cubes have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? Hold onto your nuts, this ain’t no ordinary blowjob.

As a scarecrow, people say I’m outstanding in my field. But hay, it’s in my jeans.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are in an elevator. They all are standing there awkwardly until one of the spots a stain on the carpet. The redhead says
“it looks like cum”. The brunette smells it and says “it smells like cum”. The blonde goes and licks it and says ” nobody in this building”.

How is life like a penis? Your girlfriend makes it hard.

What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist.

What do boobs and toys have in common? They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.

An atheist, a Crossfitter, and a vegan walk into a bar. I know because they told me.

What’s the best thing about dating homeless chicks? You can drop them off anywhere.

The difference between kinky and perverted is the difference between using a feather, and using the rest of the bird.

I don’t think it’s possible for me to become a sniper. Not by a long shot.

A little girl and boy are fighting about the differences between the sexes, and which one is better. Finally, the boy drops his pants and says, “Here’s
something I have that you’ll never have!

The little girl is pretty upset by this, since it is clearly true, and runs home crying. A while later, she comes running back with a smile on her face. She
drops her pants and says, “My mommy says that with one of these, I can have as many of those as I want!”

A boy says to a girl, “So, sex at my place?” “Yeah!” “Okay, but I sleep in a bunk bed with my younger brother, and he thinks we’re making sandwiches, so we
have to have a code. Cheese means faster and tomato means harder, okay?” Later on, the girl is yelling, “Cheese cheese, tomato tomato!” The younger brother
says, “Stop making sandwiches! You’re getting mayo all over my bed!”

Maria went home happy, telling her mother about how she earned $20 by climbing a tree. Her mom responded, “Maria, they just wanted to see your panties!”
Maria replied, “See Mom, I was smart, I took them off!”

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Don’t make me come in there!

Why is being in the military like a blow-job? The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.

What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.


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