130+ Dog Jokes That Are So Touching!

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funny dog jokes

There is more than what we think about Jokes? Ain’t it? Well, this section is all about Dog Jokes That Are So Touching yet has the magic to make us laugh or enjoy at times of need and stress! So, here is your chance to explore the greatness of such clean jokes just the way you want!

Here are our 130+ Dog Jokes That Are So Touching!

Pooches are amicable, steadfast, wicked (once in a while), minding and best of all – hilarious essentially. It’s the reason people have given them the adept moniker, “man’s closest companion.” They accomplish senseless and sketchy things on occasion, which makes for completely humorous canine jokes, images, and jokes.

We have scoured the web to and fro, read incalculable canine joke books and counseled with individual pooch darlings. This is our curated rundown of the big cheese jokes (in no specific request) best jokes and canine plays on words of our textured companions, without a doubt.

  1. The Woman with a Husband that Thinks He’s a Dog: A lady strolls into a psychoanalyst’s office and says, “Specialist, my better half believes he’s a pooch! I don’t have the foggiest idea what to do! If you don’t mind help.” The specialist answers, “OK, have him jump on the couch. “The lady immediately snapped back, “Pause, no, he’s not permitted on the sofa!”
  2. The Trouble of flying your Dog: A lady called an aircraft: Customer-administration work area inquiring as to whether it was conceivable to fly with her pooch ready. “Sure,” the aircraft operator stated, “as long as you give your own kennel. “She kept on clarifying that the pet hotel should have been enormous enough for the canine to stand up, plunk down, pivot, and move over. The client was confounded: 
”I’ll always be unable to show him the majority of that by tomorrow!”
  3. The Collie-blossom: As I was strolling down the road a day or two ago, I saw my neighbor pulling a rope with a bit of Cabbage on the end. I went and enquired him by asking for which reasons are you pushing along a lead with a Cabbage on the other rear end?” To which he replied, by saying that Oh God, the man who gave it to me said it was a Collie!!”

Now, you know how joyful these 130+Dog Jokes collection can be! So, sit back and spread the vibe!

Q: What dog keeps the best time?
A: A watch dog!

best dog jokes

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Q: Why are dogs like phones?
A: Because they have collar IDs!

dog jokes

Q: Why is a tree like a big dog?
A: They both have a lot of bark!

famous dog jokes

Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs?
A: Right where you left him!

funny dog jokes

Q: What do you call a great dog detective?
A: Sherlock Bones!

popular dog jokes

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Q: Why do dogs run in circles?
A: Because it’s hard to run in squares!

Q: What do you get when you cross a sheepdog with a rose?
A: A collie-flower!

Q: What do you get when you cross a racing dog with a bumblebee?
A: A greyhound buzz!

Q: Why did the snowman name his dog “Frost”?
A: Because “Frost” bites!

Q: Which dog breed absolutely LOVES living in the city?
A: A New Yorkie!

Q: What do you get when you cross a cocker spaniel, a poodle, and a rooster?
A: A cockerpoodledoo!

Q: What do you get when you cross a frog and a dog?
A: A croaker spaniel!

Q: What do you get when you cross a dog with a phone?
A: A golden receiver!

Q: Why aren’t dogs good dancers?
A: Because they have two left feet!

Q: What did one flea say to the other?
A: Should we walk or take a dog?

Q: Why should you be careful when it rains cats and dogs?
A: Because you might step in a poodle!

Q: Why can’t dogs work the DVD remote?
A: Because they always hit the paws button!

Q: How are a dog and a marine biologist alike?
A: One wags a tail and the other tags a whale!

Q: Why was the dog sweating so much?
A: She was a hot dog!

Q: What did the waiter say to the dog when he brought out her food?
A: Bone appetit!

Q: How do fleas travel from place to place?
A: By itch-hiking!

Q:Which dog breed does Dracula love the most?
A: Blood hounds!

Q: What’s a dog’s favorite dessert?
A: Pupcakes!

Q: What kinds of stores do dogs love the most?
A:Re-tail stores!

Q: What’s a dog’s favorite kind of pizza?
A: Pupperoni pizza!

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Q: Which dog breed chases anything that’s red?
A: A bull dog!

Q: What did the dog say when he sat on some sandpaper?
A: That’s ruffffffff!!

Q: What’s a dog’s favorite instrument?
A: A trombone!

Q:What did the hungry Dalmatian say after his meal?
A: “That hit the spots!”

Q: What type of market should you NEVER take your dog?
A: A flea market!

Q: What do you call it when a cat wins a dog show?
A: A CAT-tastrophy!

Q: What do you call a dog that’s been out in the cold?
A: A pupsicle!

Q: What do you do if a dog chews your dictionary?
A: Take the words right out of his mouth!

Q: Which breed of dog is the quietest?
A: A hush puppy!

Q: Which dog breed just LOVES bubble baths?
A: A shampoodle!

Q: What did the dog say to the flea?
A: Quit bugging me!

Q: What’s a dog’s favorite breakfast food?
A: Pooched eggs!

Q: Why did the Dalmatian go to the eye doctor?
A: He kept seeing spots!

Q: Which dog breed is guaranteed to laugh at all of your jokes?
A: A Chi-ha-ha!

Q: What does a dog get when she finishes obedience school?
A: Her pet-degree!

Q: How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a monster?
A: Terrier-fied!

Q: Why did the dog cross the road?
A: To get to the “barking” lot!

Q: What is it called when a cat wins a dog show?
A: A CAT-HAS-TROPHY!

Q: What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A: A bloodhound!

Q: What happened when the dog went to the flea circus?
A: He stole the show!

Q: What do you get if you cross a gold dog with a telephone?
A: A golden receiver!

Q: What does my dog and my phone have in common?
A: They both have collar I.D.

Q: What do you get if you cross a Beatle and an Australian dog?
A: Dingo Starr!

Q: What do you call a dog magician?
A: A labracadabrador.

Q: What do you get when you cross a race dog with a bumble bee?
A: a Greyhound Buzz.

Q: Why wouldn’t the dog sit on his chair?
A: Because he left his sheet[shit] on there.

Q: What do you call a large dog that meditates?
A: Aware wolf.

Q: Why did the dog need help on his Pros and Cons chart?
A: He was CON-fused!

Q: What do you call a frozen dog?
A: A pupsicle.

Q: What did the skeleton say to the puppy?
A: bonappetite

Q: What do you get when you cross a dog and a calculator?
A: A friend you can count on.

Q: Did you hear about the dog who couldn’t stop talking like a horse?
A: It was a dog and pony show.

Q: What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly?
A: The collie wobbles!

Q: What do you call a black Eskimo dog?
A: A dusky husky!

Q: What do you call a cold dog?
A: A Chilli Dog.

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Q: How is a dog and a marine biologist alike?
A: One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.

Q: What do you get if you cross a dog with a frog?
A: A dog that can lick you from the other side of the road!

Q: When does a dog go “moo”?
A: When it is learning a new language!

Q: Why do dogs bury bones in the ground?
A: Because you can’t bury them in trees!

Q: Why did the poor dog chase his own tail?
A: He was trying to make both ends meet!

Q: What kind of dog chases anything red?
A: A Bulldog.

Q: Why did a dog enter the church in the middle of a religious mass?
A: Because he was a German shepherd.

Q: What state do dogs like?
A: New Yorkie.

Q: What happened to the dog that swallowed a firefly?
A: It barked with de-light!

Q: What is a dogs favorite instrument?
A: A trombone.

Q: What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose?
A: A collie-flower!

Q: What’s a dog’s ideal job?
A: Barkeology

Q: Why do dogs wag their tails?
A: “Because no one else will do it for them!”

Q: Why didn’t the dog speak to his foot?
A: Because it’s not polite to talk back to your paw!

Q: Why don’t blind people like to sky dive?
A: Because it scares the hell out of the dog.

Q: What is the dogs favorite city?
A: New Yorkie!

Q: Why does no one want to work for dogs?
A: Because they hound their employees.

Q: What do you call a dog that goes to the bathroom indoors?
A: A pet project.

Q: Who is the dogs favorite comedian?
A: Growlcho Marx!

Q: What do dogs and story tellers have in common?
A: They both have tails!

Q: What kind of dog likes taking a bath?
A: a shampoodle!

Q: What happens when a dog chases a cat into a geysur?
A: It starts raining cats and dogs.

Q: What did the cowboy say when the bear ate Lassie?
A: “Well, doggone!”

Q: How can if you have a stupid dog?
A: It chases parked cars!

Q: What is a dog’s favorite sport?
A: Formula 1 drooling!

Q: What do you get if you take a really big dog out for a walk?
A: A Great Dane out!

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?
A: It doesn’t matter…. he’s not going to come anyway.

Q: What dog can jump higher than a tree?
A: Any dog can jump higher than a tree, trees cant jump.

Q: Where does a Rottweiller sit in the cinema?
A: Anywhere it wants to!

Q: What did the angry man sing when he found his slippers chewed up by the new puppy?
A: “I must throw that doggie out the window!”

Q: Why did the dog wear white sneakers?
A: Because his boots were at the menders!

Q: Why did the owner get his dog a special collar?
A: He didn’t want her to flea.

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Q: Why does a dog lick his own dick?
A: Because he cant make a fist

Q: Why does the dog bring toilet paper to the party?
A: Because he is a party pooper.

Q: What is a dog’s favorite food?
A: Anything that is on your plate!

Q: What is the only kind of dog you can eat?
A: A hot dog!

Q: What kind of dog sounds like you can eat it?
A: A sausage dog!

Q: What did the cat say to the dog?
A: Check meow-t!

Q: What do you do if your dog eats your pen?
A: Use a pencil instead!

Q: What do you get if you cross a dog and a cheetah?
A: A dog that chases cars – and catches them!

Q: What happens when it rains cats and dogs?
A: You can step in a poodle!

Q: What do you call a dog that licks an electrical socket?
A: Sparky.

Q: Where did the dog fall asleep?
A: In the barking lot.

Q: What do you call a dog that swallows a ball?
A: Ballshit.

Q: What’s a dogs favorite kind of pizza?
A: Pupperoni.

Q: What time is it when ten dogs chase a cat?
A: Ten After One.

Q: What do you call a dog with a Rolex?
A: A watch dog.

Q: Why was the cat scared of the tree?
A: Because of its bark.

Q: What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear?
A: A petticoat!

Q: What do you call a dog with a fever?
A: A hot dog.

Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs?
A: Right where you left him.

Q: What happens when you name your dog after Tiger Woods?
A: You give a dog a bad name.

Q: What do you get if you cross a dog and a lion?
A: A terrified postman!

Q: Why can’t dogs work the DVD remote?
A: Because they always it the Paws button!

Q: What did the dog say to the sandpaper?
A: Ruff.

Q: What happened to the dog that ate nothing but garlic?
A: His bark was much worse than it’s bite!

Q: What do you tell the guy who says he has a bulldog and shih tzu mix?
A: Bullshit

Q: Why wasn’t the dog a smooth talker?
A: Because all he ever said was “Rough, Rough”

Q: What do you call a dog with a surround sound system?
A: a Sub-woofer.

Q: What do dogs eat for breakfast?
A: Pooched eggs.

Q: What do you call a pug that is undercover?
A: Indognito
Q: What is a dogs favorite flower?
A: Anything in your garden!

Q: What dog wears contact lenses?
A: A cock-eyed spaniel!

Q: What’s more amazing than a talking dog?
A: A Spelling Bee.

Q: Why do all dogs go to Heaven?
A: Because Michael Vick is in Hell.

Q: What kind of dress shoe does Michael Vick wear?
A: Hush Puppies!

Q: What’s a dog favorite hobby?
A: Collecting fleas!

Q: What did the dog say to the tree?
A: Bark

Q: How does a dog stop a video?
A: By pressing the paws button.

Q: Why did the dog sleep under the car?
A: Because he wanted to wake up oily.

Q: What is the fastest dog in the world?
A: A Labraghini.

Q: Where do you put barking dogs?
A: In a barking lot.

Q: What was the special offer at the pet store this week?
A: Buy 1 Dog get 1 Flea!

Q: Where do dogs go after their tails fall off?
A: The re-tail store.

Q: What did the dog say to the flea?
A: Stop bugging me!

Q: What has four legs and an arm?
A: A pit bull in a park.

Q: What do you call a dog that can use the toilet?
A: A “poo-dle”

Q: What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?
A: a chili dog on a bun!

Q: Why did the dog stay in the shade?
A: Because he did not want to turn into a hot dog.

Q: Why did the dog bury himself in the back yard?
A: Cause you can’t grow a tree without bark.

Q: What do you do when your dog goes missing in the forest?
A: Put your ear to a tree and listen for the bark.

Q: What do you do when the UPS man apologizes for smashing your stuff?
A: You call off the dogs.

Q: What do you call a cross between a matador and a cute little puppy dog?
A: “A cocker Spaniard.”

Q: What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal?
A: That hit the spots!

Q: Did you hear about the zoo where the only exhibit was a dog?
A: It was a shih tzu

Q: Have you read the book Raising Dogs?
A: No? you should it’s a pup-up book.

Q: What do you call a boy named Charlie walking his dog to the park?
A: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory!!

Q: Why did the dog cross the road twice?
A: He was trying to fetch a boomerang!

Q: What do you get if you cross a Rottweiller and a hyena?
A: I don’t know but I’ll join in if it laughs!
Q: What do you get if you cross a cocker spaniel, a poodle and a rooster?
A: Cockerpoodledoo!

Q: What do you call a sheepdog’s tail that can tell tall stories?
A: A shaggy dogs tale!

I asked my dog what’s that thing on top of the house?
And the he said “Roof Roof”.

What did the tree say to the dog?
Tree: Do you like bark?
Dog: What do you think? I bark every day of my life. Of course I do

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