100+ Conan O’ Brien Quotes that makes him a Spontaneous Host

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Conan o'brien saying

Conan O’ Brien Quotes that makes him a spontaneous host. There are so many Conan O’ Brien quotes that can help you when you are tired of being in the same old rut, and all you need is a little push, a little inspiration, a smile on the face, change of mood, bring you out of the banality of life, make you laugh a little, or may even make you cry a bit, and these Conan O’ Brien quotes exists just do that.

Born on April 18, 1963, in Brookline, Conan Christopher O’Brien was brought up in an Irish Catholic family. Know best as an American Television host O’Brien has also proved himself as a Comedian, Writer and producer. He is best known for the various late night talk shows. Since 2010 he has done the role of the host to the best of him in TBS, a cable channel.

Apart from this, he has served as a writer in Not Necessarily the News which is a comedy series. He attended Harvard University, where he got the chance to be the president of The Harvard Lampoon. After gaining experience by writing several comedy shows, he finally joined the Saturday Night Live as a writing staff. O’Brien was the writer and producer of the American animated sitcom, The Simpsons.

Later he got an opportunity to take over David Letterman’s position in late night in 1993.  Because of his vibrant nature, the show gradually gained the attention of many, and in 2009 O’Brien departed. He was noted for his vibrant and spontaneous style of hosting, which earned him opportunities in various American television shows. Apart from this, he has hosted the Christmas in Watson and Emmy Awards. A documentary called Conan O’Brien Can’t Stop been made for O’Brien in 2011 by Rodman Flender. On May 2015, with the retirement of David Letterman, at 25 years, O’Brien became longest working late-night talk show hosts currently in the United States.

Conan O’Brien became known for his spontaneous hosting style, characterizing “self-deprecating humour, awkward” and he was spontaneous in On Late Night. O’Brien listed David Letterman, Sid Caesar, Warner Bros. Cartoons, Peter Sellers, Ernie Kovacs, Woody Allen and Bob Hope as his influences for comedy. O’Brien influenced Pete Holmes, James Corden and Mindy Kaling.

Conan O’Brien’s father, Thomas O’Brien is a professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School, apart from that he is a physician, epidemiologist. Ruth O’Brien, the mother of O’Brien, is the former partner of Ropes & Gray, a Boston based firm, ad she is also a retired attorney. O’Brien has two sisters and three brothers.

We have dug up these Conan O’ Brien quotes from the depths of the internet and brought together best of these sayings in a single article. This post is probably the biggest database of Conan O’ Brien Sayings in a single place. These famous Conan O’ Brien quotes have the power to change your life by giving a novel outlook about the way you observe different aspects of your life. Hence, these popular Conan O’ Brien quotes should be read with caution and proper understanding of the context. Here are tons of Conan O’ Brien quotes that will open a treasure chest of Wisdom and experiences: –

“One’s dream is constantly evolving, rising and falling, changing course.”

Conan o'brien Best Quotes

“When all else fails, there’s always delusion.”

Conan o'brien Popular Quotes

“If the object of tennis is to hit the ball into the net and swear a lot, I’m very, very good.”

Conan o'brien Famous Quotes

“I love waking up to the sound of birds arguing with their spouses.”

Conan o'brien Quotes

“It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique.”

Conan o'brien saying

“A group of psychologists say they have discovered twenty-three different body language indicators that show whether or not a person is lying. If you would like to see all twenty-three at the same time, they recommend taking a guided tour of the White House”

“A new presidential poll reveals that Democrats have the edge among voters under 30 The good news for Republicans is that there’s only six people under 30 who actually vote.”

“A new report says ISIS is trying to recruit professionals like doctors, engineers, and accountants. Sorry, kids, even ISIS says they’re not hiring liberal arts majors.”

“A new report says that dogs can sniff out prostate cancer with almost 98 percent accuracy. The report also finds that cats can sniff it out with 100 percent accuracy but they prefer to watch you die.”

“A woman on a Southwest Airlines flight gave birth to a baby. As soon as he was born, the baby said, ‘I had more leg room in the womb.'”

“After hearing that he has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize, Putin said, ‘Tell me who the other nominees are – and I will eliminate them.'”

“All I ask is one thing, and I’m asking this particularly of young people: please don’t be cynical. I hate cynicism, for the record, it’s my least favorite quality and it doesn’t lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.”

“Donald Trump unveiled his immigration policy and now he’s getting a lot of flak. His policy would have prevented his own grandfather from coming to America. That explains his new campaign slogan: ‘Vote Trump to prevent another Trump.'”

“Facebook revamped its search feature. Now you can search for any post that has ever appeared on your page. It’s helpful if you want to waste time this year remembering exactly how you wasted time last year.”

“Fall down. Make a mess. Break something occasionally. Know that your mistakes are your own unique way of getting to where you need to be. And remember that the story is never over.”

“I hear YouTube, Twitter and Facebook are merging to form a super Social Media site – YouTwitFace.”

“I’ve always heard that women secretly want their father. So I used to walk around in a 1950s business suit, with a hat and a pipe. My opening line would be, ‘You should be getting to bed now.'”

“Just taught my kids about taxes by eating 38% of their ice cream.”

“Nobody knows really what they’re doing and there’s two ways to go with that information. One is to be afraid and the other is to be liberated, and I choose to be liberated by it.”

“President Bush delivered a commencement speech at a university in Wisconsin. A very inspirational speech. Apparently Bush told the students, ‘You can do anything in life if your parents work hard enough.'”

“Scientists say they’re getting closer to developing a pill to replace exercising. Americans heard this and said that it better come in cool ranch flavor.”

“‘Shrek 2’ made over $120 million during its first week. In a related story, John Kerry asked Shrek to marry him.”

“St.Patrick’s Day is named for St. Patrick, the first guy to feed Guinness to a snake.”

“The beauty is that through disappointment you can gain clarity, and with clarity comes conviction and true originality.”

“There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realized.”

“This week Disney opened its first ever theme park in China. More than ten thousand children showed up on opening day. And that was just to make the T-shirts.”

“Today, you have achieved something special, something only 92 percent of Americans your age will ever know: a college diploma. That’s right, with your college diploma you now have a crushing advantage over 8 percent of the workforce. I’m talking about dropout losers like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, and Mark Zuckerberg.”

“10 of Hollywood’s Most Memorable Commencement Speeches by Courtney Idasetima, www.hollywoodreporter.com. April 30, 2018. ”

“A woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you’d step over your own mother just to get to one!”

“At drive-thrus, I order in a British accent but pay in a French accent. Someday they’ll ask “Where’s the British guy?” but so far not yet.””

“Donald Trump insisted he’s always had a great relationship with women. He said, ‘I believe a woman can be anything she wants to be, whether that’s Miss USA or Miss Universe. Either one.'”

“Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?”

“Every time I see a newborn, I’m reminded of how rare and beautiful it is to look into the face of someone who’s never heard of Trump.”

“I just saw a Dumbledore, a Gandalf, and a Doctor Strange make a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos disappear!”

“I thought that achieving that goal would define me as successful, but that is not true. No specific job or career goal defines me; and it should not define you.”

“If Calvin Harris can’t make it work with Taylor Swift, what hope do any of us chiseled, 6’6” DJs have?””

“If you wear a visor for longer than 3 minutes, you’re legally required to change your name to Trey.”

“Mr. Burns: I like to put my feet up.”

“My parents won’t say which of their six kids they love the best, but they have told me I finished just out of the top five.”

“On Easter, the Pope asked for peace in the Middle East. There are two groups the Pope has to contend with – Jewish people and Muslims. They couldn’t wait to hear his suggestions.”

“Open Tweet to Justin Bieber: You’re starting to make us teen heartthrobs look bad.”

“Smithers: For the love of God, sir, there are two seats! ”

“So if I don’t get caught it’s a ‘free sample’ and if I do get caught it’s ‘stolen property, please come with me, sir?’ Real double standard.”

“The Canadian government continues to say they will not help us if we go to war with Iraq. However, the prime minister of Canada said he’d like to help, but he’s pretty sure that last time he checked, Canada had no army.”

“The days are getting shorter, but do they have to compensate by acting like assholes?”

“The Obstacle Is The WayFailureFrom Failure To SuccessInspirational”

“The only bathroom law I’m interested in is one that bans loud sighing.”

“There are few things more liberating in this life than having your worst fear realised.”

“They say the Verizon guy switched to Sprint but if you watch the commercial he mouths the words: ‘Verizon, I’m sorry, they have my family.'”

“To my fellow hikers: that noise I made when the butterfly came toward my face was a terrified shriek of delight.”

“Upon death, instead of having my whole life flash before my eyes, I just want to watch Season 3 of The Sopranos again.”

“Whatever you think your dream is now, it will probably change. And that’s okay.”

“When I’m on the freeway I can’t help but honk at the a-holes who don’t like my violent, unpredictable driving.”

“Your perceived failure can become the catalyst for profound reinvention.”

“If you work really hard, and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.”

“A study in the Washington Post says that women have
better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the
authors of that study: ‘Duh.”

“All I ask is one thing, and I’m asking this particularly of young people: please don’t be cynical. I hate cynicism, for the record, it’s my least favorite quality and it doesn’t lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.”

“It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique. It’s not easy, but if you accept your misfortune and handle it right your perceived failure can become a catalyst for profound re-invention.”

“The top two movies at the box office this weekend were ‘High School Musical 3’ and ‘Saw V.’

One movie features gruesome onscreen torture that is difficult to watch and the other is about a guy with a saw.”

“My favorite comedy is comedy where nothing is achieved and there is no point.”

“I told graduates to not be afraid to fail, and I still believe that. But today I tell you that whether you fear it or not, disappointment will come. The beauty is that through disappointment you can gain clarity, and with clarity comes conviction and true originality.”

“Applaud my idiocy.”

“I just want to say to the kids out there watching: You can do anything you want in life. Unless Jay Leno wants to do it too.”

“There is nothing more liberating than having your worst fear realized.”

“Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, “Jesus! This cup is expensive!”

“Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.”

“Rev. Pat Robertson says that if more states legalize gay marriage, God will destroy America. He did say that afterwards, gays will come in and do a beautiful renovation.”

“Disappointment leads to clarity, which leads to conviction and true originality.”

“It’s a mistake to read. Television is the only way. ”

“Music and comedy are so linked. The rhythm of comedy is con­nected to the rhythm of music. They’re both about creating tension and knowing when to let it go. I’m always surprised when somebody funny is not musical.”

“If I existed 200 years ago, all the other farmers in my community would be like, ‘That guy is worthless! He’s sitting on a rock, jumping up like a frog, coming up with weird concepts and ideas, making faces, and combing his hair into a giant pastry.’ It’s a good thing I was born in this century, when superfluous television seems to be part of the economy.”

“Republicans have called for a National African-American Museum. The plan is being held up by finding a location that isn’t in their neighborhood. ”

“I’ve always believed, in my heart of hearts, that it would be a better show if, when I crossed over to the desk, the band kept playing for an hour and I danced in a cage.”

“It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique.”

“Please do not be cynical. I hate cynicism – it’s my least favorite quality, and it doesn’t lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.”

“If you accept your misfortune and handle it right, your perceived failure can become a catalyst to profound reinvention.”

“Work hard and be kind and amazing things will happen.”

“You know why the French don’t want to bomb Saddam Hussein Because he hates America he loves mistresses and he wears a beret. He is French people.”

“When all else fails there’s always delusion.”

“All I ask of you is one thing: please don’t be cynical. I hate cynicism — it’s my least favorite quality and it doesn’t lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard, and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.”

“Blow it up.”

“There are few things more liberating in life than having your worst fear realized.”

“Nobody in life gets exactly what they though they were going to get.
But if you work really hard and are kind, amazing things will happen.
I’m telling you: Amazing things will happen.”

“Earlier today, Arnold Schwarzenegger criticized the California school system, calling it disastrous. Arnold says California’s schools are so bad that its graduates are willing to vote for me.”

“You know why the French don’t want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He IS French, people.”

“The whole experience was surreal. It was a fevered dream.”

“CBS news anchor Dan Rather has interviewed Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein. When asked what it was like to talk to a crazy man, Saddam said, ‘It’s not so bad.'”

“Apparently the new high-tech Star Wars toys will be in stores any day now. The toys can talk and are interactive, so they can be easily distinguished from Star Wars fans.”

“Yesterday American and British troops handed out food to hundreds of Iraqis. Not surprisingly, the Iraqis handed the British food back.”

“Early on, they were timing my contract with an egg timer.”

“In a prime-time address, President Bush said he backed limited federal funding for stem cell research. That’s right, the President said, this is a quote, the research could help cure brain diseases like Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, and whatever it is I have.”

“Michael Jackson was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. It caused quite a controversy, because his nose isn’t eligible for another fifteen years.”

“Pamela Anderson Lee released a statement confirming that she has had her breast implants removed. Doctors say that Pamela is doing fine and that her old implants are now dating Charlie Sheen.”

“If life gives you lemons, make some kind of fruity juice.”
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“Several hard-core Star Wars fans who had tickets for the first showing actually said that when the movie finally began, they started crying. Mainly because they realized that it’s 22 years later, and they still haven’t lost their virginity.”

“President Clinton signed a $10 million deal to write a book by 2003. Isn’t that amazing? Yes, and get this, not only that, President Bush signed a $10 million deal to read a book by 2003.”

“Scientists announced that they have located the gene for alcoholism. Scientists say they found it at a party, talking way too loudly.”

“Fish recognize a bad leader.”

“A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: ‘Duh.'”

“In New York, we had primary elections for mayor. To improve their chances, all five candidates changed their name to Rudy Giuliani.”

“John Travolta said he sometimes lets his friends take control of his airplane even though they don’t know what they’re doing. Then Travolta said he often does the same thing with his career.”

“It’s not every day I get to meet the president of a country.”

“In West Virginia yesterday, a man was arrested for stealing several blow-up dolls. Reportedly, police didn’t have any trouble catching the man because he was completely out of breath.”

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