110+ Birthday Jokes You Can Relate To

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birthday jokes

In a world of confusion and misunderstanding that often stresses out, we have only one recourse that will pull us out from such miseries! Wondering what is it? Very simple! They are nothing else but Jokes! The very word joke can make us forget about the world we are in and at the same time enable us to lead a happy life! But wait, have you heard about women jokes? If not here is your chance!

Keeping in view of the trend and popularity associated with birthday jokes, we have compiled 110+ Birthday Jokes That You Can relate to! Not alone that, these jokes will also leave you in a pool of laugh and joy in no time!

Ready to uncover them?

Have you been searching for the best birthday wants for those individuals throughout your life who like the jokes and extra perky jabs? Well at that point, giving your friends and family a wry birthday wish is certainly the best approach. From mischievous wishes to energetic, giggling actuating cites, mocking wishes will make your loved ones feel like you realize them all around ok to laugh out loud with them-even on their birthday events.

While mockery has its points of confinement, and can at times go over the line, it is a fun thing to impart to those nearest to you. With these birthday wishes you can share the endowment of giggling, narrating, and memory-production, all through a couple of words deliberately considered (or go the choice of birthday images in the event that you need something extremely less complex). Coming up next is an aggregation of the best wry birthday wishes that will no uncertainty add a bonus exceptional to anybody’s birthday.

Wry Birthday Messages:

  1. For your birthday today, I’m giving you what you allow me consistently mockery, a container heap of issue, and a bunch of deviousness. Upbeat birthday.
  2. Gives a shout out to you this uncommon day. What day is it? It’s the day you shot through your mom’s uterus! Cheerful birthday.
  3. What?! You’re how old? That resembles practically dead in doggy years…. Hopefully, you benefit as much as possible from the couple of years you have left. Upbeat birthday.
  4. Goodness extraordinary, I hear it’s your birthday. Does that mean today you get the chance to utilize that as your reason to get squandered? Alright, alright… I’m in… however simply because it’s your birthday. #favors
  5. Hello! It’s your birthday! I adore this day since we both get the opportunity to party hard and live huge this one day of the year. Much obliged for making your huge day mine as well!

So, the next time if you want a break, just read these 110+ Birthday Jokes You Can Relate To for a fun-filled experience!

Does a pink candle burn longer than a blue one?
No, they both burn shorter!

best birthday jokes

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What sort of birthday cake do ghosts prefer?
I Scream Cake.

birthday jokes

When’s your birthday?
July 23rd.
What year?
Every year.

famous birthday jokes

Happy 10th birthday to your dating profile pic.

funny birthday jokes

Why do we put candles on the top of birthday cakes?
Because it’s too hard to put them on the bottom.

popular birthday jokes

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What do you say to a kangaroo on its birthday?
Hoppy Birthday.

What is it about birthdays that make kangaroos unhappy?
They only get to celebrate them in leap years.

What goes up and never comes down?
Your Age.

Why are birthdays good for you?
People who have the most live the longest.

What do you always get on your birthday?
Another year older.

What did the Teddy Bear say after blowing out his birthday candles?
No cake for me… I’m stuffed!

Patient: “Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.”
Doctor: “Next time, take off the candles.”

What happens when no one comes to your birthday party?
You can have your cake and eat it too.

I used to be a boy trapped in a woman’s body. But after 9 long months, I was finally born!

It’s always a good idea to make friends with babies. That’s free cake once a year for a lifetime.

I was born to be a pessimist. My blood type is B Negative.

What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye Matey.

It’s my wife’s birthday tomorrow. Last week I asked her what she wanted as a present.
“Oh, I don’t know”, she said. “Just give me something with diamonds”.
That’s why I’m giving her a pack of playing cards.

A couple had been debating the purchase of a new auto for weeks. He wanted a new truck. She wanted a fast little sports-like car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range.
“Look!” she said. “I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 4 seconds or less. And my birthday is coming up. You could surprise me.”
So, for her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale.

A man gets up and heads off to work despondent that not one member of his family has wished him Happy Birthday. What an ungrateful lot he thinks.
When he gets to work his attractive secretary asks him what’s wrong and he explains.
“Why don’t I take you out to lunch to cheer you up,” she says.
After a lovely lunch and a couple of glasses of champagne, she says do you mind if we drop into my apartment on the way home.
Interested, he replies,” Sure!”
At her apartment she smiles, fixes him a drink, and then says, “I just have to slip into the bedroom for a minute.”
In a moment she’s back with a birthday cake, his family and all his friends.
And there’s him lying naked on the couch.

When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.

You know you’re getting old when…
You and your teeth don’t sleep together.

You know you’re getting old when…
People call at 9 p.m. and ask, “Did I wake you?”

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You know you’re getting old when…
You begin every other sentence with, “Nowadays…”

You know you’re getting old when…
Things you buy now won’t wear out.

You know you’re getting old when…
When happy hour is a nap.

You know you’re getting old when…
You sing along with the elevator music.

You know you’re getting old when…
When all you want for your birthday is to not be reminded of your age.

You know you’re getting old when…
You sit in a rocking chair and can’t get it going.

You know you’re getting old when…
There’s nothing left to learn the hard way.

You know you’re getting old when…
You need to keep a fire extinguisher close to the cake.

A man gives his wife an expensive bottle of wine for her birthday. After a few glasses the wife blurts out, “I love you”.
The husband responds: “Is that you or the wine talking.”
Wife: “This is me, I’m talking to the wine”.

Man wakes up and says nothing. Wife annoyed shouts, “You’ve forgotten what day it is haven’t you.”
Man goes to work and confides to a colleague, “I think I forgot my wife’s birthday.”
“Not a problem,” he replies. Just go out and buy her a beautiful new dress and a pearl necklace.”
After work the man races home and showers his wife with gifts.
“Oh darling,” she replies, “ what a beautiful new outfit to pick my mother up from the airport in.”

A husband reels off a list of presents he suggests buying his wife for her birthday.
She rejects them all.
“Well you tell me what you want then.”
“I want a divorce.” she replies.
“I wasn’t planning on spending that much.”

Man to wife, “Blow out your candles and make a wish”.
The wife does but a look of disappointment crosses her face.
“What’s the matter,” he asks.
“My wish didn’t work.” she replies.
“How do you know already?” he enquires.
“You’re still here.”

After much dithering a woman summons the courage to ring her friend and sing Happy Birthday to her over the phone.
Half-way through her rendition she realises she’s rung the wrong number.
“Why didn’t you stop me when you realise it was a wrong number,” she asks the lady on the other end of the phone.
“You need all the practice you can get!”

A twin complains to his mother, “ You said you didn’t have a favourite between me and Brian.”

We don’t darling,” replies his mother. “What would make you say such a thing?”

“Then why am I blowing up balloons for his surprise birthday party.”

Birthday Invitation: What? You are invited to Cathy’s birthday party. Where? 1424 Maple Dr. (you will need to be buzzed in, so dial our number with your nose and you will then be buzzed in. Once, you’re in the building, press the button for the elevator with your nose. Then press floor number 12 with your nose. We are the door on the left hand side.) Can’t wait to see you! P.S. You will be pushing with your nose, because your hands will be too busy holding the presents.

Older women to her friend about remarrying, “When I pass away I want my husband to be so upset he has to dropout of college.”

Looking 50 is great! If you’re 60.

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Wine improves with age. We improve with wine.

Chinese kid was born before the due date. Parents named him Sudden Lee.

Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

My girlfriend isn’t talking to me. She said I ruined her birthday. I’m not sure how. I didn’t even know it was her birthday.

I finally realized my parents favored my twin brother. It hit me when they asked me to blow up balloons for his surprise birthday party.

When I was young, I always felt like a male trapped in a females body. Then I was born

I like birthdays, but I think too many can kill you.

I was born to be a pessimist. My blood type is B Negative.

It’s always a good idea to make friends with babies. That’s free cake once a year for a lifetime.

As I handed my Dad his 50th birthday card, he looked at me, with tears in his eyes and said, “You know, one would have been enough.”

The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.

It’s easier to remember your age if you don’t change it every year.

The older you get, the more you need to keep a fire extinguisher close to the cake.

The number one cause of death is too many birthdays.

I used to be a boy trapped in a woman’s body. But after 9 long months, I was finally born!

Why are birthday’s good for you? Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest!

Gave my co-worker the Heimlich maneuver. Proving once again I’m no good at birthday gifts.

If you feel a bit lonely, forgotten, or just need someone to cheer you up remember…You can always change your birthday on facebook!

Where do you find a birthday present for a cat? In a cat-alogue!

Your secrets are safe with me because I literally won’t remember them. This also applies to your birthday. Your birthdays are safe with me.

I bet the worst part about being a birthday cake is when you’re set on fire, and then eaten by the hero that saved you.

“Were any famous men born on your birthday?” “No, only little babies.”

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.

I’ve never enjoyed my surprise birthday parties because all I can think about is how good my friends are at lying to my face.

Birthday: The anniversary of the day God slapped you on the butt and said, “Okay Kid, go get in the game. Play hard, play fair, and don’t get too many penalty flags.”

You know youre fifty when your chiropractor sends you birthday cards.

Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.

My birth certificate was a letter of apology that my dad got from the condom company…

Today is your birthday, so congratulate yourself, especially if you’re still young enough to remember it.

Happy Birthday! You’re now living proof of the old saying that “Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.”

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby’s sex?
A: Wait until it’s born.

My mom’s favorite part of my birthday is describing my birth in detail to an 18 year old waitress who is just there to get our drink order.

Happy birthday, Bono. I wanted to get you the perfect present, but I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.

I made dinner reservations for my wife’s birthday and told the host there’s an extra $20 for the bartenders if they card her.

Which came first? The birth, or parental disappointment?

What did one candle say to the other? “Don’t birthdays burn you up?”

On your birthday, remember: don’t drink and tattoo.

Thanks to Facebook, I never forget the birthdays of people I don’t really know.

You know you’re getting old when you have more candles on your cake than friends at your birthday party.

I asked my mother where I have been born when she told me in a hospital. I responded: “Mom was I ill?”

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The best way to remember your 21st birthday, is not at all. Have fun blacking out.

How can you tell that you’re getting old? You go to an antique auction and three people bid on you!

For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday.

What goes up and never comes down? Your age!

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you was?

Was invited to a birthday party last evening but didn’t have a Blast. Hardly any Bombs!

People come and go but birthdays do accrue.

I’d like to say the best moment of a woman’s life is giving birth, but it’s actually seeing an old nemesis and realizing she got really fat.

A birth certificate is an apology from the government that you are now indentured and a social security number that you are no longer a sovereign.

When you were born your mom said: “It’s a treasure.”
Dad said: “Ya let’s bury.”

I thought it was my birthday cake but it was just the shed on fire.

What did Hitler get his niece for her birthday? A easy bake oven but with the Jews sold separate.

You can have too much of a good thing: birthdays.

For my wife’s birthday, I bought her a fridge freezer. I know it’s not much, but you should have seen her face light up when she opened it.

The best present is the present made by your own slaves.

You so ugly, your mama had morning sicknesses after you were born.

Your so ugly when you were born your mom said “Oh what a treasure” and your dad said “Yeah le´ts bury it.”

Immaculate conception is spreading rapidly, with adult born yesterday!

When you were born the doctor slapped your mama and said “oh goodie twins”.

You so ugly your mum ran up the stairs of the hospital when you were born and jumped off the roof.

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