100+ Step Brothers Quotes that explains the Value of Family

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Step Brothers Best Quotes
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Step Brothers Quotes that explains the value of family. There are so many Step Brothers quotes that can help you when you are tired of being in the same old rut, and all you need is a little push, a little inspiration, a smile on the face, change of mood, bring you out of the banality of life, make you laugh a little, or may even make you cry a bit, and these Step Brothers quotes exists just do that.

Step Brothers was one of the best comedy films in America that were directed by Adam McKay. This film was written by Will Ferrell and McKay. The film was adapted from a story that was written by John C Reilly, McKay and Ferrell.  The film shows us the life of two adult men Brennan and Dale. After their single parents decided to get married, these men are forced to live together. The film stars Kathryn Hahn, Adam Scott, Mary Steenburgen and Richard Jenkins. The film was produced by Jimmy Miller and Judd Apatow under the banner of four production companies. The film was distributed by Columbia Pictures. The film was released on 25th July 2008. It is a 98-minute long movie.

The film was produced within the budget of around sixty-five million dollars and grossed about $128 million worldwide.  The film introduces two people Brennan Huff and Dale Doback, who are childish adults. Brennan’s mother Nancy and Dale’s father Robert meet and later fall in love. They decide to get married which lead the circumstances for Brennan and Dale to live as brothers.  But these stepbrothers later enter into silly arguments which erupt violently. One of their relatives arranges interviews for the job for both Brennan and Dale. But they fail in all of them. Later Nancy and Robert decide to start a voyage in a ship and hence try to sell their house. This forces the stepbrothers to earn a living, and hence they start an entertainment company. They named it as Prestige Worldwide. While the two brothers’ start liking each other, Robert says, he wants to divorce Nancy.  This split the brothers, and they start to live and earn separately. After being successful in their lives, these brothers meet and decide to unite their family.

Their attempt becomes successful, and six months later, both Nancy and Robert start living together.  Brennan and Dale become successful with their entertainment company. The film was praised for extreme comedy. It was a gut buster and was rated a 5.5 out of 10.  On IMDB the film was rated 6.9 out of 10. The film is noted best for its story, how two strangers make the best brothers.

We have dug up these Step Brothers quotes from the depths of the internet and brought together best of these sayings in a single article. This post is probably the biggest database of Step Brothers Sayings in a single place. These famous Step Brothers quotes have the power to change your life by giving a novel outlook about the way you observe different aspects of your life. Hence, these popular Step Brothers quotes should be read with caution and proper understanding of the context. Here are tons of Step Brothers quotes that will open a treasure chest of Wisdom and experiences: –

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“I still hate you, but you have a pretty good collection of nudie magazines.”

Step Brothers Best Quotes

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“You don’t even look good when you’re singing.”

Step Brothers famous Quotes

“You know what gets my d*ck hard? Helping out my friends.”

Step Brothers popular Quotes (4)

“One time I wrestled a giraffe to the ground with my bare hands.”

Step Brothers saying

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“You and your mom are hillbillies. This is a house of learned doctors.”

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“Oprah, Barbara Walters, your wife. You gotta f*ck one, marry one, kill one. Go!”

“Robert better not get in my face…’cause I’ll drop that mofo!”

“You have the choice of an angel. Your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.”

“I have a belly full of white dog crap in me, and now you lay this sh*t on me?

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“I’ve traveled five hundred miles to give my seed.”

“I tea-bagged your drum set!”

“This wedding is horse sh*t”

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“Stay golden, Ponyboy.”

“Brennan has a man-gina!”

“Pow!”

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“Hey Derek, sprechen sie d*ck?”

“I swear, I’m so pissed off at my mom. As soon as she’s of age, I’m putting her in a home.”

“Hey Derek, you know whats good for shoulder pain?”

“What?”

“If you lick my butt hole”

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“‘Bobby you are 17, it’s time to throw childish things aside’ and I said ‘OK Pop’, but he didn’t really say that he said ‘Stop being a fucking dinosaur and get a job.'” — Dr. Robert Doback

“I remember my first beer”

“I smoked pot with Johnny Hopkins”

“You don’t know anyone named Johnny Hopkins.”

“It was Johnny Hopkins, and Sloan Kettering, and they were blazing that shit up everyday.”

“Boats and hoes!”

“Did we just become best friends?”

“Yep!”

“Do you wanna do karate in the garage?”

“Yep!”

“There’s so much room for activities!”

“I think I can help with the Pan/Pam situation.”

“That’s so funny the first time I heard that, I laughed so hard I fell off my dinosaur.”

“Brennan, Denise called and she said she can’t spend New Year’s Eve with you because she’s not your girlfriend, she’s your therapist.”

“Brennan, that is the voice of an angel. Brennan I can’t even make eye contact with you right now. Your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.”

“Dad, what are you doing? It’s ‘Shark Week’!”

“Did we just become best friends?”

“I feel like a lightning bolt hit the tip of my penis!”

“I have a belly full of white dog crap in me, and now you lay this shit on me?”

“I still hate you, but you have a pretty good collection of nudie magazines.”

“I want to roll you into a little ball and shove you up my vagina. You could just live there, it’s warm and it’s cozy… Oh I’d just walk around with you in there and just knowing, whenever I feel a little tickle or scratch it’s your hair on my vagina!”

“I work at a college as a janitor even though I feel like I’m smarter than most of the people who go there. Sometimes I see an equation written on a blackboard like half an equation and… I just figure it out.”

“I’m going to take a pillowcase and fill it full of bars of soap and beat the shit out of you!”

“I’m not gonna call him Dad…Even if there’s a fire!”

“It’s time to throw childish things aside,’ and I said, ‘Okay, Pop.’ But he didn’t really say that, he said, ‘Stop being a fucking dinosaur and get a job.'”

“This is going to sound weird, but for a second, I think you took on the shape of a unicorn.”

“One time I wrestled a giraffe to the ground with my bare hands.”

“Brennan, that is the voice of an angel. I can’t even make eye contact with you right now. Your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.”

“Why are you so sweaty?” — Dale “I was watching cops.”

“I’m f*cking miserable. I had to get up at 10 o’clock this morning.”

“I still hate you, but you have a pretty good collection of nudie magazines.”

“Robert better not get in my face, ’cause I’ll drop that mother f*cker.”

“You’re not a doctor. You’re a big fat curly-headed f*ck.”

“Hey Derek, you know what’s always good for shoulder pain? If you lick my butthole.”

“Dad, what are you doing? It’s ‘Shark Week’!”

“Do you wanna go do karate in the garage?”

“So many activities!”

“Did we just become best friends?”

“Dr. Robert Doback: When I was a kid, when I was a little boy, I always wanted to be a dinosaur, I wanted to be a Tyrannosaurus Rex more than anything in the world, I made my arms short and I roamed the back yard, I chased the neighborhood cats, I growled and I roared, everybody knew me and was afraid of me, and one day my dad said “Bobby you are 17, it’s time to throw childish things aside” and I said “OK Pop”, but he didn’t really say that he said that “Stop being a fucking dinosaur and get a job”.

“Dale Doback: Okay, here’s the shot out of the cannon: Oprah, Barbara Walters, your wife. You gotta fuck one, marry one, kill one, go!”

“Dale Doback: The only reason you’re living here is because me and my dad decided that your mom was really hot, and maybe we should just both bang her, and we’ll put up with the retard in the meantime.”

“Derek: I have to sell or lease at last 80 helicopters to make my nut. And you… You mess with my nut, Brennan, Randy here is gonna eat your dick.
Randy: Like Kobayashi.
Randy: [makes eating noise]
Derek: I’ve seen him do it.
Brennan Huff: You’ve actually seen him eating a man’s penis?
Derek: It was in international waters, so they couldn’t prosecute him. But I saw it.”

“Dale Doback: Why do you have Randy Jackson’s autograph on a martial arts weapon?
Brennan Huff: Cause I bumped into him and all I had on me was this samurai sword… And you’re not gonna not get Randy Jackson’s autograph, Right?
Dale Doback: I would’ve done the exact same thing.”

“Brennan Huff: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I will kick you repeatedly in the balls, Gardocki!”

“Dale Doback: Dad, what are you doing? It’s Shark Week.”

“Brennan Huff: I have a green belt… read it and weep.
Dale Doback: I don’t believe in belts.”

“Dale Doback: Hey. Are you awake?
Brennan Huff: Yeah.
Dale Doback: I can’t believe we actually have to move out of this house.
Brennan Huff: I know. I feel bad.
Dale Doback: Hey, you know, we don’t have to whisper anymore. Mom and Dad aren’t here.
Brennan Huff: Yeah, but can we keep doing it, though? It helps me pretend that they are.”

“Derek: I am the VP of the biggest executive helicopter leasing company on the western seaboard. I haven’t had a carb since 2004. Check these out.
[Points to ab muscles]
Derek: See these? See these boys? This is what I live with, every day. I lather this up with Kiehls in the shower. You want to touch this shit?
Dale Doback: No.
Derek: You want to touch these bad boys? Sorry, not gonna happen.”

“Dr. Robert Doback: [they start getting hot and heavy] My name is Robert, and I play racquetball. I collect coins.
[breathes heavily]
Dr. Robert Doback: Sweet Jesus! I love Korean food!
Nancy Huff: [breathing heavily] I am Nancy Huff; I know how to make Tandoori Chicken.
[continues undressing]
Nancy Huff: I contribute to NPR every single year…
[pause]
Nancy Huff: … and I love the movies of Rob Reiner! Pilates changed my life!
[they continue making out while stripping off their clothes]
Dr. Robert Doback: [they make out on the bed] I have a boat, and I wanna retire and sail around the world…
Nancy Huff: Oh, I LOVE the sea!
[they kiss and embrace each other]
Dr. Robert Doback: And I drive a Mercedes and I have a 40-year-old son, Dale, who still lives at home!
[pause]
Nancy Huff: [rises from the bed and looks down at him, shocked] What did you *just* say?
Dr. Robert Doback: [sulks] Oh! I knew I shouldn’t have told you that!
Nancy Huff: I have a 39-year-old son named Brennan- who still lives at home with me!
[they begin to have sex]”

“Dr. Robert Doback: [at his wedding ceremony] I would like to thank all of you… for being here with us on this fantastic, wonderful day! And I would like to raise my glass; Dale and I wanna welcome you to our home with open arms!
Dale Doback: [abruptly gets up out of his chair and throws his plate, rolling his eyes] UGH! Get a room, Dad!
Dr. Robert Doback: [as Dale walks out] Oh for chris- Dale!”

“Derek: What if I were to tell you that I could sell this house… for 30 percent above market?
Dr. Robert Doback: That’d be great. Could you do it?
Derek: Yeah. In a heartbeat, Robby. Look, I got my real-estate license a few years back for shits and gigs. I’d even do it for four-fifths commish… because you know what really gets my dick hard? Helping out my friends.”

“Brennan Huff: I’m so scared right now. I’m just gonna to do what’s sensible, I’m gonna file for unemployment. Then I’m gonna try to get a job at Enterprise Rent-A-Car, because they got an excellent corporate structure and they… *they* give *you* the tools to be your own boss.”

“Dale Doback: I manage a baseball team.
Nancy Huff: Oh, little league?
Dale Doback: Fantasy league.”

“Dale Doback: We’re in the bathroom!
Alice: This’ll just take a minute. There’s really little you can do about it. Let me just hop on.
[suddenly opens his pants and mounts him against the wall]
Dale Doback: It’s all slippery!”

“Dr. Robert Doback: You have one month to find jobs or you’re out on your asses. I will arrange interviews for Monday and you will go!
Dale Doback: Dad, why are you talking to me like this? I’m your son.
Dr. Robert Doback: I’m not buying that crap anymore!”

.
“Nancy Huff: [During Christmas Dinner. Tiffany is 12] What about you Tiffany, what did you get for Christmas?
Tiffany: I got this Mikimoto pearl necklace, but next year I’m gonna ask Santa for breast implants because I’m impatient with my body.”

“Brennan Huff: This house is a fucking prison!
Dale Doback: On Planet Bullshit!
Brennan Huff: In the galaxy of This Sucks Camel Dicks!”

“Dale Doback: Why are you so sweaty?
Brennan Huff: I was watching Cops.”

“Brennan Huff: I’m not gonna call him Dad.
Nancy Huff: Brennan, you’re 39 years old. I wouldn’t expect you to call him Dad.
Brennan Huff: Well I’m not going to, *ever*! Even if there’s a fire!”

“Dale Doback: You and your mom are hilbillies. This is a house of learned doctors.
Brennan Huff: You’re not a doctor… you’re a big, fat, curly-headed fuck!”

“Dale Doback: Suppose Nancy sees me coming out of the shower and decides to come on to me. I’m looking good, got a luscious v of hair going through my chest pubes down to my ball fro. She takes one look at me and goes ” Oh my god, I’ve had the old bull now I want the young calf” and she grabs me by the weiner.
Dr. Robert Doback: Shut the fuck up!”

“Male Therapist: So, Dale. I don’t know how much you know about therapy, but it usually starts by you telling me a little something about yourself.
Dale Doback: I work at a college as a janitor even though I feel like I’m smarter than most of the people who go there. Sometimes I see an equation written on a blackboard like half an equation and… I just figure it out.
Male Therapist: Is this Good Will Hunting?
Dale Doback: No.
Male Therapist: It sounds a lot like the plot of Good Will Hunting.
Dale Doback: Yeah, anyway. My best friend is Ben Affleck…”

“Dr. Robert Doback: You jagaloons! You’re failures! FAILURES!
Brennan Huff: Hey, you’re embarrassing yourself, you geriatric fuck!
Nancy Huff: Brennan.
Brennan Huff: Two things: You keep your liver-spotted hands off my beautiful mother. She’s a saint! And then you sit down and you write Dale and Brennan a check for $10,000.
Nancy Huff: Oh, stop it! Stop it right…
Brennan Huff: Or I’m gonna shove one of those fake hearing devices so far up your ass…
Nancy Huff: Brennan!
Brennan Huff: …you can hear the sound of your small intestine as it produces shit!”

“Brennan Huff: I swear, I’m so pissed off at my mom. As soon as she’s of age, I’m putting her in a home.”

“Dale Doback: I’m just saying, you need to think about your options. I know you two are technically married but that does not mean that they have to live here.
Dr. Robert Doback: Dale, I think it’s time for a change. For both of us.
Dale Doback: Dad, we’re men. That means a few things – we like to shit with the door open, we talk about pussy, we go on riverboat gambling trips, and we make our own beef jerky. That’s what we do, and now that is all wrecked.”
[brief pause]
Dr. Robert Doback: We literally have never done any of those things.

“Dale Doback: Brennan you’re alive! Oh my God!
Brennan Huff: I know. I’m alive.
Dale Doback: You were dead. I saw you die.
Brennan Huff: I was faking. I used ninja focus to slow my heart rate down.”

“Denise: So, I thought we’d begin talking about your parents’ divorce.
Brennan Huff: Okay.
Denise: How old were you when they got divorced?
Brennan Huff: Fifteen.
Denise: That’s a hard age.
Brennan Huff: Yes. Yeah.
Denise: Do you want to talk about some of those feelings?
Brennan Huff: I love you.
Denise: Obviously… you don’t know me.
Brennan Huff: I love you so much.
Denise: Thank you, and I will take that as a feeling that you have of… comfortability with me.
Brennan Huff: It’s more than comfortability. I mean, I fuckin’ love you.
Denise: Okay, I… think…
Brennan Huff: I’m just thinking about our life together. I feel like I’m walking on a cloud. My penis is tingling right now.
Denise: That is so… off-putting.
Brennan Huff: You’re not feeling this?
Denise: In no way, shape, or form do I feel any feelings of intimacy towards you in any way whatsoever.”

“Brennan Huff: You know what? I still hate you, but you got a pretty awesome collection of nudie mags.
Dale Doback: Yeah, I got ’em from the 70’s, 80’s and 90’s. It’s like masturbating in a time machine.”

“Derek: You can have some dope parties on this lawn.
Second Homebuyer Husband: You don’t have to talk like that. You can just say it’s nice.
Derek: Nah, that’s how I talk. Look at this door, it’s fresh.”

“Nancy Huff: Brennan, Denise called and she said she can’t spend New Years Eve with you because she’s not your girlfriend she’s your therapist
Brennan Huff: Is that what she said? She’s a rascal.”

“Dale Doback: [Talking to an employment agency worker] Look, I wanna’ be honest with you. I really need a job. And, I will take any position – as long as it doesn’t involve having sex with old ladies for money, or bear traps. Those are my two bugaboos. TC mark”

“This house is a f*cking prison!

“On Planet Bullshit”

“In the galaxy of This Sucks Camel D*cks!

“Why are you so sweaty?”

“I was watching ‘Cops’.”

“Dane Cook, pay–per–view, 20 minutes, let’s go!”

“I’m f*cking miserable. I had to get up at 10 o’clock this morning.”

 

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